I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
