I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
How does one acquire holy water?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
