Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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