Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
