Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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