Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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