very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
