When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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