Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Blow job season was short but glorious.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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