I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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