He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
