Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
