Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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