Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She bit a glass in half.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
and eventually we just all took our pants off
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
