you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
