Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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