My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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