Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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