Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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