I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
