Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
