Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
