I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
