What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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