I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize