Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
