dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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