Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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