How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
