I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
