Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
