She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We got so high we made milksteak
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
