I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
