I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
