Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
