What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
