Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
