Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
