she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
