Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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