btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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