I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
