she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
