On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
