Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
