You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
