She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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