Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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