I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
My vagina just clenched in fear
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
