Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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