why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
