I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
